this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
