i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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