I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I wish I only lived at night.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
