he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize