she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
