If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
