At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
