So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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