when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
