remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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