I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
