Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
