did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
