Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
