Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I would ride that face into the sunset
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
