yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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