Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
