Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
