with your own penis?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
