I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
