I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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