It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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