yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
