do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
