Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
