Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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