Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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