I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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