I wanna passion pit in your ass
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
