He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize