Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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