My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
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she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
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Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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