I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
