Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
They left me at home... I'm a liability
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
