Just mADE A PArabola og urine
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
