What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
