It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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