brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
