I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
