im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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