he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
