More tranny stories later!
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
