The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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