Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday http://tfl.nu/tnzp
  Replies (2) Good night (1642) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis. http://tfl.nu/mahz
  Replies (33) Good night (923) Bad night (5817)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details. http://tfl.nu/93dt
  Replies (26) Good night (6475) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better. http://tfl.nu/gf52
  Replies (6) Good night (1940) Bad night (3279)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks http://tfl.nu/x484
  Replies (13) Good night (5968) Bad night (907)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far" http://tfl.nu/dqcq
  Replies (14) Good night (2462) Bad night (1441)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot. http://tfl.nu/9hr6
  Replies (10) Good night (2353) Bad night (1682)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team. http://tfl.nu/53x1
  Replies (11) Good night (3156) Bad night (976)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud. http://tfl.nu/vndr
  Replies (11) Good night (1464) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible. http://tfl.nu/5wo9
  Replies (5) Good night (1007) Bad night (507)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex http://tfl.nu/ior9
  Replies (4) Good night (950) Bad night (1060)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock. http://tfl.nu/jkqv
  Replies (0) Good night (531) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh http://tfl.nu/ih42
  Replies (1) Good night (589) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (587): View more from Alberta

  I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (587): I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast. http://tfl.nu/t2q0
  Replies (6) Good night (648) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know

  (1-989): View more from Michigan

  im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know (1-989): im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology. http://tfl.nu/m7q7
  Replies (2) Good night (695) Bad night (262)

Randomize