Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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