i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
