her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
