i may or may not be watching the land before time
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize