Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
