Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
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The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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