Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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