Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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