i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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