Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
